Blue Monday: is it time to ditch the New Year Resolutions?
How have you welcomed in 2023?
Have you started the year off with some pretty big goals and new years resolutions? Many of us spend some time at Christmas and New Year reflecting on the year that has passed and the year that lies ahead. In the hustle and bustle of a busy season we are encouraged to be prepared, to plan the best year ever, to think about what we want to achieve. Mix this with the excitement of Christmas, which can be pretty intense if you have little ones in the house, and the longing for change and renewal to enter in the next year. We can get carried away with setting unrealistic goals.
We look at the year ahead and commit to changing our habits, our motivation, our thinking and our being. Each year starting out intending a big overhaul of ourselves and our lives. Now, I am not saying this is a bad thing, in fact I think reflection and change is crucial to growth but……… you have to do the work!
Personal development and change is not something you can just decide today, and achieve tomorrow, well not usually anyway. This approach leaves us wallowing in self-condemnation when we fail to overcome the first hurdle: The world has not changed! Time remains fleeting and illusive and somehow work seems busier and more stressful, budgeting season sets in, and we turn our focus to money, both professionally and personally.
Suddenly reality dawns, we have spent more than we thought, well in 2023 inflation being what it is, the bills are higher for less! We start to wonder where that feeling of positivity and motivation disappeared to. There are no excited children shoring up our emotional lives, as they head back to school. There is no more cheery music blaring in the shops and offices to keep our spirits up. The parties and celebrations have ended and now we are back to where the rubber hits the road, where we need to face the dark days and persistent rain both physically and metaphorically. It hits us with a bang. Something commonly referred to as Blue Monday.
I was doing some research to find out about the science that backs this concept, and was surprised to find that there wasn’t any. I googled the idea and came across and interesting article in a news paper [i]. To precis a little, the term Blue Monday is attributed to psychologist Cliff Arnal, a psychology tutor at a further education centre attached to Cardiff University at the time. It appears he was approached and paid by PR agency Porter Novelli, to work on a formula back in 2005 for the now-defunct TV channel Sky Travel. His task was to determine the best day of the year to book summer holidays, and the concept of Blue Monday was born.
Dr. Sandi Mann, senior lecturer in psychology at the University of Central Lancashire told i: “Blue Monday is mainly a marketing ploy for organisations to hang some message on – it isn’t a proven phenomenon.” [ii]
This marketing tool has had a massive impact and it is no surprise that mental health advocates are also using this to raise more awareness around mental health, however, it should be noted that some more established mental health organisations are distancing themselves from this concept, as it trivialises the very real issues and challenges that people face. These are not one-day experiences. Booking a holiday will not resolve the very real challenges that people with poor mental health face. Mind, a mental health charity, published a statement back in 2016 which starts by saying “This year we wanted to dispel the myth that the third Monday in January is the most depressing day of the year and remind people that depression is a serious condition that can affect people on any day”[iii].
We may have started the year with some ambitious personal change goals, some of which we have already failed to maintain. We are also being bombarded with marketing around Blue Monday, the most depressing day of the year. Sounds like a self-fulfilling prophecy in motion. What can we do to build our resilience and stop the downward spiral thinking?
Here are some tips on making the year ahead successful and avoiding these pitfalls in the coming years:
1. Ditch the resolutions.
Set your intentions to work on your own personal development throughout the year and plan in when you will do the work. Personal change and development are sustainable and transformative when the change is incremental and consistent overtime. Before you decide what, this change is, make some time for you – regularly. A walk, meditate, go for a massage, or a run. Take time to really reflect on your strengths and weaknesses, your desires and future. Your relationships and job, your family. Take your personal development journey seriously and plan it into your year. Self-awareness can be hard work, so get yourself some support. A coach, a therapist, or sign up for training. It is hard to do on your own.
2. Set SMARTER Goals
If setting goals is important to you, then start by setting smaller more productive and achievable goals for the first quarter of the year. Something like taking time to de-clutter or exercise you can link this to your self-care. Moving your body can support the release of endorphins, and research[iv] shows that having a clean, organised space can help you feel in control. It also helps you to have some time away from your thoughts and problems as you focus on the task in front of you. Small positive achievable actions will help you stay motivated through winter months and allow you the time to focus on the business of creating a life you love everyday, without overwhelming your to do list and increasing the pressure. Ease into the year with positivity and balance.
3. Prioritise Sleep
Perhaps the most important, well for me anyway, priority is focusing on getting good sleep. Sleep is correlated to mental health, even intuitively this makes sense. When overtired I am far more emotional, far more reactive. The benefits of sleep to both physical and mental health are well documented so you can’t go wrong prioritising sleep if this year, success is your desired outcome[v].
As a coach I often talk about the principles for success – they are key to ensuring you do not set yourself up for failure.
Start by knowing your outcome, think a little further into the future than just one year. Your life is an exciting adventure that you get to create. Then take some action to help you on your journey. Doing things will often highlight whether the direction we have chosen is right for us or not. When it is right then often that first step is the most challenging.
Use your sensory acuity, in other words take note of what does work, and what doesn’t. We often talk about there being no failure only feedback, however, we still need to take some action to get that feedback.
Then change your behaviour one step at a time as you learn and grow from your experiences. This will help you build your behavioural flexibility each day. Approach your day, week, month year with a positive mindset and operate from a physiology and psychology of excellence.
Remember perfection is not excellence! This is a journey, a daily commitment to your personal development, and a tool to create the freedom and balance that has inspired the desire for new years resolutions in the past.
[i] https://inews.co.uk/news/science/blue-monday-today-most-depressing-day-year-why-myth-explained-243350 accessed 13 Jan 2023
[ii] https://inews.co.uk/news/science/blue-monday-today-most-depressing-day-year-why-myth-explained-243350 accessed 13 Jan 2023
[iii] https://www.mind.org.uk/news-campaigns/news/busting-the-blue-monday-myth-with-blueanyday/ accessed 13 Jan 2023
[iv] https://my.clevelandclinic.org/podcasts/health-essentials/decluttering-your-life-how-cleaning-and-mental-health-are-connected-with-dr-dawn-potter accessed 13 Jan 2023
[v] https://www.sleepfoundation.org/mental-health accessed 13 Jan 2023
